Unfiltered Mama Blog

Collection by Courtney - Unfiltered Mama

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Posts from my blog, unfilteredmamasite.wordpress.com. Follow along as I share a day in the life filled with anxiety and depression. My goal is to reach out to those who are silently suffering. You are NOT ALONE!

Courtney - Unfiltered Mama
With each scheduled appointment, I felt like my anxiety was at an all time high. I refused to admit that along with the little scenarios I was sorting out in my head, a trail of depression was also…

Bite the bullet.

With each scheduled appointment, I felt like my anxiety was at an all time high. I refused to admit that along with the little scenarios I was sorting out in my head, a trail of depression was also…

I was face to face with square one. All of the progress I had made went down the drain and stuck to the bottom of the pipes. I trusted myself to fall into the arms of someone who understood why I w…

Another chance to…

I was face to face with square one. All of the progress I had made went down the drain and stuck to the bottom of the pipes. I trusted myself to fall into the arms of someone who understood why I w…

When I looked at my reflection in our dirty bathroom mirror, one that I said I would clean weeks ago, I was staring at someone I didn’t recognize. Damaged hair, raccoon eyes, oily skin……

Cushion.

When I looked at my reflection in our dirty bathroom mirror, one that I said I would clean weeks ago, I was staring at someone I didn’t recognize. Damaged hair, raccoon eyes, oily skin……

My tears were falling off of my face, one by one, soaking through my daughters outfit that I so carefully picked. I placed my thumb in the palm of her fragile hand and waited for that instant clasp…

Battle Wounds.

My tears were falling off of my face, one by one, soaking through my daughters outfit that I so carefully picked. I placed my thumb in the palm of her fragile hand and waited for that instant clasp…

No tearing, no stitches… not even the slightest concern of how many hands were currently between my legs. There was a mirror just ahead of where my bed sat and my initial thought was to look …

Defeat

No tearing, no stitches… not even the slightest concern of how many hands were currently between my legs. There was a mirror just ahead of where my bed sat and my initial thought was to look …

Being that it had only been a couple hours since returning from the hospital, I was trying not to make a fool out of myself in such short time. The contractions were ranging anywhere from five to t…

One Last Push

Being that it had only been a couple hours since returning from the hospital, I was trying not to make a fool out of myself in such short time. The contractions were ranging anywhere from five to t…

I wasn’t worried about the bump on my head, not one bit. All I cared about was how strong of a heartbeat I would hear from the monitor before me. Such a simple confirmation turned my worries …

Ready? Or not.

I wasn’t worried about the bump on my head, not one bit. All I cared about was how strong of a heartbeat I would hear from the monitor before me. Such a simple confirmation turned my worries …

I was in and out of consciousness, but the fear that enclosed my body was strikingly loud. The voice inside my head was spitting words directly toward the attention it needed. Of course I was liste…

Limit

I was in and out of consciousness, but the fear that enclosed my body was strikingly loud. The voice inside my head was spitting words directly toward the attention it needed. Of course I was liste…

Happy tears flooded my eyes when the ultrasound confirmed we were having a girl. Even though I could only see her through the screen, I felt like our connection was already unbreakable. I had a pow…

Cold skin

Happy tears flooded my eyes when the ultrasound confirmed we were having a girl. Even though I could only see her through the screen, I felt like our connection was already unbreakable. I had a pow…

My skin was stretching and my insides were temporarily misplaced. Each time I walked by a mirror, I couldn’t help but gaze over the small bump I was carrying around. It fit perfectly into the…

Elation

My skin was stretching and my insides were temporarily misplaced. Each time I walked by a mirror, I couldn’t help but gaze over the small bump I was carrying around. It fit perfectly into the…

To be settled back home was exactly what I needed to start feeling excited about this pregnancy. My family stood behind us with every step, even those that stopped us in our tracks on a stormy day.…

Rich with…

To be settled back home was exactly what I needed to start feeling excited about this pregnancy. My family stood behind us with every step, even those that stopped us in our tracks on a stormy day.…

Regardless of how excited I was to be pregnant again, it felt better to keep it a secret until I could no longer hide it. I was fearful of spreading the word too soon… while possibly misscarr…

Coming home

Regardless of how excited I was to be pregnant again, it felt better to keep it a secret until I could no longer hide it. I was fearful of spreading the word too soon… while possibly misscarr…

My limp body made its way to the bathroom nearly seconds before I vomited everywhere. It was barely morning when I decided to take another pregnancy test. Our window shades were slightly open, allo…

Adjusting to…

My limp body made its way to the bathroom nearly seconds before I vomited everywhere. It was barely morning when I decided to take another pregnancy test. Our window shades were slightly open, allo…

Days rolled by… weeks even. I occasionally caught myself holding my belly, desperately trying to feel the connection I once felt before. I had convinced myself that losing my child was someth…

Pack up

Days rolled by… weeks even. I occasionally caught myself holding my belly, desperately trying to feel the connection I once felt before. I had convinced myself that losing my child was someth…

Mourning the loss of my child had put me in a dark state of mind, one that I didn’t want to elude from. I could barely make sense of any of it. What had I done to betray my body… my baby? Bet…

White.

Mourning the loss of my child had put me in a dark state of mind, one that I didn’t want to elude from. I could barely make sense of any of it. What had I done to betray my body… my baby? Bet…

men gifts

An Uncommon Goods Holiday

This post has been compensated by Uncommon Goods. However, all opinions and suggestions are my own! Goodbye, Summer! In just a blink of an eye, the season came and quickly drifted off with the cur…